Co-Creator Seeks "Insight, Advice, And Inspiration" From Rachel Marie

Recently, co-creator Steven M. Paquin made a special flight home to gain "insight, advice, and inspiration" for Rachel's Graduation Gift. Due to Mr. Paquin's demanding executive schedule between college, film making, writing, acting, lobbying for Big Tobacco, owning a luxurious Las Vegas hotel and casino, and lion taming he was only able to meet with his sister, Rachel Marie, for a few hours. "I have to catch my plane to Dubai for an exclusive investors' meeting on the new rotating towers," said Mr. Paquin brushing his sister aside to reach his personal helicopter on the front lawn of his childhood home in Mapleville, Rhode Island.

When asked how he thought the meeting went Mr. Paquin stated, "It was extremely productive. Now, please, let me get aboard my personal helicopter and have the cheapest scotch on the rocks hold the ice before I go to Dubai. You know, they don't have alcohol there. It's some Muslim thing." When pressed about his age being 19, two years below the legal drinking age in the United States, Mr. Paquin refused to comment. He also could not give any specifics about the meeting, or any unique details about his sister. When provided with a concrete example as to whether Rachel Marie played tennis or danced at the Academy of Tap, Jazz, and Ballet longer, Mr. Paquin responded, "I think it was tennis, but I really cannot be bothered with such matters."

Rachel also could not comment much about the meeting other than that she is "happy about [her graduation gift] and scared at the same time," while also stating that "[she] really has no idea what other option [she's] been given besides [an] utterly unbearable" wait for the premier.

Rachel produced Steven M. Paquin and Jacob Cote's first and previous collaborative nickelodeon, "Nick: A Talkie", and confirmed that she is "producing [her] own graduation gift, which kind of is a rip off." She claimed the choice was "for lack of a better judgment," and said, "last time I let these fools borrow my filming equipment one of them left it at a motel on the West Coast and neglected to inform. I found out when I saw it on my door step in a Days Inn plastic bag."

Mr. Paquin was questioned about this before climbing aboard his personal helicopter with a scantily clad waitress already handing him his drink. He replied that he had "no recollection of that event."

Rachel also had a few words about the teaser for her graduation gift, which was released via email on August 29, the first Friday of her first last week of high school ever. Though she found "it really did not tell anything about the plot of the film," she admitted "the last trailer was greatly edited and put together." However, she was pleased to find out that her other cousin Nicholas Cote, the honoree of Mr. Paquin and Jacob Cote's first and previous collaboration, would be working on Rachel's Graduation Gift.

"I think Nick's collaboration is a great idea. Hopefully he will keep Jake and Steve in order, making sure they don't go too far astray from the plans. I know Steven is quite merciless when he makes fun of me, and Jake rather forgets to stop this, so I hope that Nick will smack them if they get out of line."

Mr. Paquin was also asked about Nicholas Cote's collaboration on the film. He called it "an enormous mistake that is probably going to cost [his] dreams of being a Hollywood Tycoon." He then characterized Nicholas Cote as a "po-mo bo-bo that wouldn't know a good film if it kicked him in the cash and prizes." In "Nick: A Talkie", Mr. Paquin asserted that "[he] could take a crap better than Nick's movie." This was, of course, only in the fictional plot of "Nick: A Talkie".

Mr. Paquin also had some hostile statements in response to his sister's comments about his allegedly poor treatment of her.

"I have no idea what she is talking about. The lack of sleep from high school and playing tennis must be getting to her. She's revisioning (sic) history. I was always an outstanding older brother."

It was then revealed to Mr. Paquin that Rachel played tennis for a fortnight prior to entering high school. To which Mr. Paquin called us "liars, scoundrels, and jackanapes," while throwing his glass of cheap straight up scotch and a lit cigar at us.

After Mr. Paquin's departure we further pressed Rachel about some specifics of her graduation gift. She revealed that she only really knew two specifics. First, "that many of Steven's shady characters will be present in the production," such as, "usuals like Scotty Lancaster and Mr. Barley." Second, "that someone will be 'metaphorically' playing me." However, she did not know who. She doubted it would be Nicholas Cote, claiming that " they will really want to play up the whole fact that he WAS my 'favorite' cousin." Ultimately, she concluded that "one of them will have a wig on pretending to be me," and that "Steven might even make [her] into one of his characters."

She also revealed that Mr. Paquin's exclusive visit was not the first time one of the co-creators sought her advice.

"Jacob Cote has sought out my advice and insights for the film. He spent quite a deal of time questioning me about my dance career from the very beginning to the very end. I figured he sudden interest in my dancing (which never existed while I actually participated) had to do with this movie."

As for other potential sources of exclusive information on herself, she doubted that the co-creator "have gone super stealthy and asked [her] other friends who know [her] a great deal since [she] doubt[s] they know who these would be." However, she did admit that her "brother does talk to [her] friends Kerry and Eliza," and that "Jacob did ask which ones might be attending [her] family grad party."

In regards to being an executive producer for "Nick: A Talkie", Rachel Marie stated that she "thought it was a tad too long" because "it just wasn't moving at some parts." There were also numerous "technical aspects of it that [she] had problems with, but it was too late to fix them by the time [she] saw it. Overall though, she thought "it was very creative and found it funny."

However, she also stated her problems with the title of "Nicke: A Talkie", alleging that it "was rather mundane," and that the title of her graduation gift "better be damn creative" because she is "far from a mundane person."

When asked what she would like the title of her graduation gift to be, she said:

"Something creative that only I and my brother and cousins would get hopefully. Maybe something Squash Boy inspired or spawning from all those Goldeneye games we've played. I don't know too many girls who know the facility level like me. Although, I think my uncanny ability to whoop all of their asses in Risk is something rather inspiring and deserves to be title-worthy, but I doubt they would do that since it would mean I am actually better than them at something."

Ultimately, she admitted she could be wrong about everything she assumed because "You never know with these three."

Unfortunately, Jacob Cote, Nicholas Cote, and Carl Weathers could not be reached for comment on Mr. Paquin's meeting with Rachel Marie, or Rachel Marie's assumptions about her graduation gift.